Whenever I have a lot going on (and I'm guessing you're pretty stacked out at the moment), and I feel stressed to the eyeballs I find that spending an hour or two with my daughter Pinkie is just the tonic. Pinkie is usually full of interesting chatter, sometimes you wonder how such a young mind can come up with these topics (she's nine, ten in August). You will be hard pushed to hold on to your angst when you are in her company. I am available to drop Pinkie to Number 10, (obviously she can't come in the school day, Ofsted would have kittens) should you wish to take me up on my offer of a play date/cheer you up session. Pinkie isn't a fussy eater, a Laughing Cow sandwich usually does the trick as a pre-dinner snack. I have attached a picture for your reference, and so you can see for yourself how your heart will melt and that's without her saying a word. I can't recommend her enough.
In return (there's always a catch), I would be most grateful if you could sign a prescription for her. Pinkie has Cystic Fibrosis and knowing there is a drug available (Orkambi) that could potentially save her life, and yet we can't have it because its too expensive, is a far worse torture than starving to death holding a tin of baked beans but not having an opener. I can promise you that.
At birth when Pinkie was diagnosed the doctors reckoned on about 30 years life expectancy. As I previously mentioned Pinkie will be ten this summer, so we may of had a third of her already. Clearly, I will walk on hot coals before I admit defeat, but to be frank Mrs May, I really, really, really just want this nasty C.F sorted so we can crack on having a lovely life together, and if you could just see your way to signing off on the medicine I genuinely think it will be cheaper in the long run. For instance, without any medical expenses for Pinkie, if anything were to happen to her the nation would have to pick up the tab for my institutionalisation, anti-depressants, shrinks and probably a padded jacket. I am confident I would be very expensive with my diagnosed broken heart.
Anyway, I know you are extremely busy so appreciate you taking the time to read this. Here is my number 07818 XXXXXXX to arrange for Pinkie's visit to cheer you along.
Lots of Love
p.s Try not to stress out too much, I mean you're only running the country, it's not like you have a sick child to worry about because there's no bigger stress a person can bear I can promise you. Good luck and I hope it all goes well for us both. See you soon xxx
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